Just Be.
That seems so easy, but it so isn't. Not for me.
I've never learned how to do that. But now, through this circumstance, it seems God is about to teach me.
Last week was something to be reckoned with. This week has been significantly better between us.
God's shown me some things about me that need to adjust. He's revealed some things in me that I thought weren't an issue or that I didn't see, in relationship to our relationship.
Appreciation. I gotta do a much better job of that. Verbal and otherwise. I'm not good at it. And in part it's because I think that the things I see changing are things that shoulda already been his reality to start. (Yeah I know I'm wrong. I just said i gotta get better at this part. *smiles*) But the fact is, the changes are God answering my prayers and I need to be grateful, instead of acting like I'm entitled.
And lemme give credit where it's due. He's said this to me before. Just not in a way that made me willing to give it. It came across in a way that rubbed me wrong; and I responded in like fashion. Not good.
But now that I know, I'mma do my best to walk in gratefulness to God and appreciation for H.
And the other thing: let him in. Just BE. It's not always work. It's not always the next task or assignment or battle. Sometimes it just IS and you can just BE. He wants so much to know me beyond my wall. And as long as we've been together, he's never gotten beyond that wall. Not because he hasn't tried, but because I haven't offered to let him. Gotta give the man credit. He knows what battles are pointless. And that woulda been one of 'em.
Yeah. God told me lots of things about this particular battle in my own heart. And it really has little to do with H and more to do with my own make-up. But now it's time to get over that and open up. Really open up and let him see me. All of me. All of the messiness that makes me special and unique. He can handle it. I'M the one who freaks out about those sorts of things. But, he's a tough cookie. He can deal w/my 'me-ness'.
God said at the start of this particular road that it was a blessing in disguise. And it has been. We're emerging from the battleground and it's changed us somehow. Down deep. There is a new awareness of what matters - of what's worth working for.
Yay for growth and change. Thank God that the way we began this battle is not the way we're ending it.
Grace upon grace upon grace.
gotta love that...
ro
That seems so easy, but it so isn't. Not for me.
I've never learned how to do that. But now, through this circumstance, it seems God is about to teach me.
Last week was something to be reckoned with. This week has been significantly better between us.
God's shown me some things about me that need to adjust. He's revealed some things in me that I thought weren't an issue or that I didn't see, in relationship to our relationship.
Appreciation. I gotta do a much better job of that. Verbal and otherwise. I'm not good at it. And in part it's because I think that the things I see changing are things that shoulda already been his reality to start. (Yeah I know I'm wrong. I just said i gotta get better at this part. *smiles*) But the fact is, the changes are God answering my prayers and I need to be grateful, instead of acting like I'm entitled.
And lemme give credit where it's due. He's said this to me before. Just not in a way that made me willing to give it. It came across in a way that rubbed me wrong; and I responded in like fashion. Not good.
But now that I know, I'mma do my best to walk in gratefulness to God and appreciation for H.
And the other thing: let him in. Just BE. It's not always work. It's not always the next task or assignment or battle. Sometimes it just IS and you can just BE. He wants so much to know me beyond my wall. And as long as we've been together, he's never gotten beyond that wall. Not because he hasn't tried, but because I haven't offered to let him. Gotta give the man credit. He knows what battles are pointless. And that woulda been one of 'em.
Yeah. God told me lots of things about this particular battle in my own heart. And it really has little to do with H and more to do with my own make-up. But now it's time to get over that and open up. Really open up and let him see me. All of me. All of the messiness that makes me special and unique. He can handle it. I'M the one who freaks out about those sorts of things. But, he's a tough cookie. He can deal w/my 'me-ness'.
God said at the start of this particular road that it was a blessing in disguise. And it has been. We're emerging from the battleground and it's changed us somehow. Down deep. There is a new awareness of what matters - of what's worth working for.
Yay for growth and change. Thank God that the way we began this battle is not the way we're ending it.
Grace upon grace upon grace.
gotta love that...
ro
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