My parents have a membership to the country club near their home. And it is a really nice place. We went there a few weeks back for breakfast. Just the three of us.
And as we walked in, I realized that as privileged a life as I have been allowed to enjoy, that privilege also comes with certain costs.
You have probably gathered by reading my previous posts that my family, and my father in particular, are VERY involved in my life. Always have been. And really genuinely in many ways still dont' know how to let go.
All in love, to be sure. But still , they hold on to me in particular very tightly.
As we walked into the country club and I realized how spoiled I must appear on the outside because of the lifestyle my parents have been afforded, I also realized that there must be so many young people who feel painted into a box by their privilege. The expectations are great. The scrutiny is great. And the fear of not living up to the life you've been groomed to attain is even greater. You date the perfect guy. You have the perfect wedding. You buy the perfect home. You raise the perfect kids. And you manage to be poised and graceful at every turn. Always ready and willing to be that person everyone believes you are.
But what happens when your perfect life doesn't look like the country club? How do you respond to the harsh criticism because you date the perfect guy - at least for you. Or because you say 'no' to being the person everyone believes you are, and 'YES' to being authentically who you were created to be?
What do you do, when saying 'yes' to your truth leaves the people you love feeling judged and disrespected?Do you choose your truth? Do you own your life? Or do you go with the status quo? Do you just keep on doin what you've always done? And no matter which choice you make, can you really live with the costs of each? Are you REALLY willing to sacrifice yourself, for your family, or your family for yourself? Is there any way this can be a win/win situation?
All this came to mind as I walked behind my parents, into their country club early on a Sunday morning to have breakfast.
Because I am that privileged kid. And I've had to make that same choice. Had to decide if I was to remain a child, or if I truly wanted to own my life. If I wanted a perfect life, or the life that is perfect for me. I had to count that cost, and in some ways, I'm still paying that cost.
But if you ask me if it's been worth it, I'd say yes. Every bit of it. Yes, a thousand times yes. Every ounce of hurt and every tear. Because when it's all said and done, I am the one who answers for the life I've lived and the choices I've made. No one else can face that day but me. So owning my life wasn't an option. It was (and is) a requirement.
Afterall, this is really what I've been groomed to do. Live life on my terms and make it conform to my desires.
To live life to the fullest, just like the privileged peple do.
And as we walked in, I realized that as privileged a life as I have been allowed to enjoy, that privilege also comes with certain costs.
You have probably gathered by reading my previous posts that my family, and my father in particular, are VERY involved in my life. Always have been. And really genuinely in many ways still dont' know how to let go.
All in love, to be sure. But still , they hold on to me in particular very tightly.
As we walked into the country club and I realized how spoiled I must appear on the outside because of the lifestyle my parents have been afforded, I also realized that there must be so many young people who feel painted into a box by their privilege. The expectations are great. The scrutiny is great. And the fear of not living up to the life you've been groomed to attain is even greater. You date the perfect guy. You have the perfect wedding. You buy the perfect home. You raise the perfect kids. And you manage to be poised and graceful at every turn. Always ready and willing to be that person everyone believes you are.
But what happens when your perfect life doesn't look like the country club? How do you respond to the harsh criticism because you date the perfect guy - at least for you. Or because you say 'no' to being the person everyone believes you are, and 'YES' to being authentically who you were created to be?
What do you do, when saying 'yes' to your truth leaves the people you love feeling judged and disrespected?Do you choose your truth? Do you own your life? Or do you go with the status quo? Do you just keep on doin what you've always done? And no matter which choice you make, can you really live with the costs of each? Are you REALLY willing to sacrifice yourself, for your family, or your family for yourself? Is there any way this can be a win/win situation?
All this came to mind as I walked behind my parents, into their country club early on a Sunday morning to have breakfast.
Because I am that privileged kid. And I've had to make that same choice. Had to decide if I was to remain a child, or if I truly wanted to own my life. If I wanted a perfect life, or the life that is perfect for me. I had to count that cost, and in some ways, I'm still paying that cost.
But if you ask me if it's been worth it, I'd say yes. Every bit of it. Yes, a thousand times yes. Every ounce of hurt and every tear. Because when it's all said and done, I am the one who answers for the life I've lived and the choices I've made. No one else can face that day but me. So owning my life wasn't an option. It was (and is) a requirement.
Afterall, this is really what I've been groomed to do. Live life on my terms and make it conform to my desires.
To live life to the fullest, just like the privileged peple do.
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